Dad’s Rules – 50 (Actually 51) Guiding Principles

Dear Alexa,

I have always lived by a simple set of rules. These rules help guide me when I do not know the answer. The more I embrace these rules, the easier my choices (decisions) get – To the point where they are ‘instinctual.’ The one that you have heard me say over and over is “Never inconvenience others for your own convenience.” That one rule probably covers half of this list of Fifty:

1. Always do your best and never compromise who you are.  
2. Never inconvenience others for your own convenience.  
3. At a bare minimum, be honest with yourself.
4. Don’t Lie.  Don’t Cheat.  Don’t Steal.   Most important:  Don’t be an asshole. 
5. In all things, lead by example not explanation.
6. Actions speak louder than words.
7. When you are presented choices, take the one you like best.  If the choice is ‘be right’ or ‘be kind,’ always be kind. 
8. Work hard.  Play harder.  But, work first.  
9. Win wars, not battles.  Yet, fight as little as possible.  In other words – collaborate.  
10. If you made a mistake, apologize.  It does not mean you are wrong.  It means you value the relationship more than your ego.
11. Always share and help out whenever you can.
12. Always finish what you start and always try even though you may be afraid
13. Try to live a simple life.  No one wins with complex.  
14. Trust, but verify.  Everything.  Everyone. Every time.  Every place.  Always.  
15. Always leave things better than you found them.  At a minimum, put things back where you found them. 
16. ABC – Always Be Cleaning.  It takes ‘less’ effort to keep a house clean than it does to clean a house.  
17. Hope for the best.  Plan for the worst.  
18. Always be on time and be prepared. Remain disciplined at all times.
19. Be present.  Always give the activity of the moment your full attention.
20. Fear nothing.  But respect everything.
21. Decisions are based on ‘past behavior’ not ‘promised behavior’.  
22. Sometimes you are wrong. Be ok with that.
23. If you bring all the liars to the table, the truth will come out. 
24. Never take anything for granted.  And never assume. 
25. Never accept an apology from someone who just sucker punched you. But forgive him anyways – Forgiveness if for your peace of mind.
26. Always try and reduce your footprint in life, but leave deep footprints when sharing the best path traveled that you want others to find and follow.
27. Don’t hold others to a higher level of standards than you hold yourself to.  
28. Always know what your next two steps are, and try to keep next steps limited to three.  
29. Don’t be an expert at recovery.  Do it right the first time.
30. Never shake a person’s hand sitting down. Grip firmly and look them in the eye.
31. When entrusted with a secret, keep it.
32. Don’t waste good. 
33. If you feel like you are being played, you probably are.
34. Return a borrowed car with a full tank of gas.
35. Play with passion or don’t play at all…
36. Don’t let a wishbone grow where a backbone should be.
37. If you need music on the beach, you’re missing the point.
38. Be like a duck. Remain calm on the surface and paddle like crazy underneath.
39. Experience the serenity of traveling alone.
40. Never turn down a breath mint.
41. Try writing your own eulogy. Never stop revising.
42. After writing an angry email or text, read it carefully. Then delete it. 
43. Manners maketh the man or woman.
44. Give credit. Take the blame.
45. Stand up to bullies. Protect those bullied.
46. Never be “unreachable.”
47. Write down your dreams.
48. Don’t pick up pennies when there are dollars in front of you.  
49. Take care of what you have (own).  This may be the best you ever have. 
50. Be confident and humble at the same time.
51. Be neighborly.  We all have to live together.  Don’t make it worse than it needs to be.

I’m sure there are some that I forgot and some that I made add later. I often return to this document and ask myself if I’m following these rules and, more importantly, “Am I being the best person I can be?” If not, I work hard to become a better person. It’s really that simple.

I hope that you adopt some of my rules and develop your own as I’m sure they will change as you mature and grow. I encourage you to set some rules today and embrace them now. Life becomes easier when we always strive to do our best.